Types of BoSox Fans

I am a Yankee fan, and I thought this was pretty good. I think they need to do one for Red Sox fans too (obviously all in good fun). Hers my one submission<o:p> </o:p>

 Pretentious BoSox Fan<o:p> </o:p>

In brief: Faded looking RedSox shirt and hat(although both are brand new and cost a total of $80). You gotta make it look like you arent trying to be cool. Thats also why your hair looks scruffy but took you an hour to do it<o:p> </o:p>

Favorite player: Peter Gammons <o:p> </o:p>

Most cherished souvenir: Replica of Curt Shillings bloody sock<o:p> </o:p>

Recent statement: Something pretentious about <st1:city w:st="on"> Boston</st1:city> being the <st1:place w:st="on"> <st1:city w:st="on"> Athens</st1:city> </st1:place> of the West, or OBP. <o:p> </o:p>

If they saw a Red Sox fan on the subway, they'd: Start a fight with them, and then when its done complain how obnoxious Yankee Fans are <o:p> </o:p>

I am one of those "actual" Yankee fans, except for one thing: If I saw a Red Sux fan on the Subway, I'd give him/her the dirtiest, most evil, intimidating look and wonder out loud what year he/she jumped on the bandwagon and if he realizes that if he/she runs into the wrong person, he/she will get their heads pounded.

Here's my take on a type of Red Sox fan:

The Bandwagoner:

In Brief: Someone who totes around 2004 AL Champions and World Series gear like it came out of a treasure chest. Someone who thinks the Red Sox franchise began in 2004 and convieniently forget 86 years of misery. The names Babe, Bucky, Buckner, and Boone are just names that begin with the letter B. Someone who truly believes in a "Curse of A-Rod." Roots for the team just because they hate the Yankees and is influenced by the "cool" "Red Sox Nation" phenomena that, guess what, blossomed in 2004!

Favorite Player: Anyone on the 2004/2007 World Series roster or anyone who played for the Sux in 2004 or later.

Most Cherished Souvenir: A "Jeter sucks, A-Rod swallows" shirt.

Recent Statement: 2 World Series in 4 years! We're the greatest team of all time! We're better than the Yankees!!

If they saw a Yankees fan on the subway: Scream Yankees Suck at the top of their lungs. If the Yankee fan replies with a legitimate and intelligent statement, the fan will pause for five seconds, then scream Yankees Suck again.

Here's another one:

The Pink Hatter

In Brief: Wears pink Sux hats and T-shirts and goes to Sux games because it is trendy and the cool thing to do. They watch the game and cheer a foul ball, then rush out of Fenway Park to find the nearest club. Knows nothing about the century of losing and probably doesn't remember the last time they won a World Series.

Favorite Player: Manny Ortiz and David Ramirez.

Most Cherished Souvenir: Pink Sux underwear.

Recent Statement: I loooooove the Red Sox, don't you? They are the best! The Yankees are bad people. We're so cool! Yay! Go Red Sox! 2005 National Champions!!!

(I actually heard a teenage girl wearing a Pedro jersey say this to a camera during a Mets-Sux game two years ago. When asked how she would welcome Pedro in his return to Fenway, she replied: "Yeah, I'll cheer him! Didn't he win us a National Championship, or something?"

If they saw a Yankees fan on the subway: "Ewwww, you like the Yankees? Ugh, what a loser! As if!"