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Somewhere near the Yucatan Peninsula there is a giant underwater crater. Some scientists believe a meteor impact kicked up enough dust into the atmosphere to kill off the dinosaurs.
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| Terrelle Pryor says he made his Buckeye decision Wednesday morning. (AP) |
This just in after the nation's No. 1 high school player finally picked a college: Paul Bunyan wants his deal reworked.
Yeah, Pryor's legend is that big. His upside is a space walk. The most protracted, celebrated, confusing recruitment in the history of Tom Lemming ended Wednesday with the Jeannette (Pa.) quarterback choosing Ohio State.
If you've followed the Pryor timeline, you're as winded as the defenders who tried to catch him. Forty-two days and two news conferences later, we have the same result we thought we had on Feb. 6: Buckeyes uber alles.
If this is a sign of how decisive the kid is going to be with an audible, Jim Tressel just signed another Justin Zwick. None of us know that for sure, of course. YouTube, rivals.com and shadowy boosters still agree: Pryor is a franchise quarterback.
But we sure as hell can think it. The next, great American high school phenom has embarked on a journey to who knows where? He is one part athletic (6-5½, 220 pounds with a rocket arm), and one part charismatic with a dash of American Idol.
Which means he could be making millions real soon or be the next Ruben Studdard.
This country loves The Next Big Thing. What it loves even more is seeing those legends fail. It keeps cable news and Congressional hearings in business. Don't forget that in the sports arena alone, a certain haughty pitcher has gone from Rocket to Roidger.
At this rate in our culture, if Nike hasn't signed the nation's No. 1 recruit to an endorsement deal -- pausing briefly as the ink dries on the Ohio State scholarship papers -- Phil Knight deserves to be smacked upside the head with a waffle iron.
Wait. Nike deal? That would make our new BMOC a professional. We'll pause for a moment while those of you who believe that Pryor hasn't been, ahem, "well taken care of" catch up.
This is not a specific indictment of Nike, Ohio State or anyone else. We don't have names, just common sense. Pryor's coach is so disgusted with the process that he's glad this was a once-in-a-lifetime deal. That's because his life can move on.
The waffle iron is symbolic of the first pair of Nikes, the soles of which were made with the breakfast appliance. But there's a fine line between genius and the stink of burning rubber.
In one sense, Pryor can't possibly live up to the hype, can he? If he wins a national championship, that's what he was supposed to do. If he wins a Heisman, well, it's been done before in Columbus.
Already his announcement has created ripples that make that Yucatan thing look like skipping rocks:
• Whatever happened to football being the ultimate team sport? This sounds kind of obvious, but there is no doubt in this age of the zone-read spread option that the quarterback is the most important player on the field. This one has been compared to Texas' Vince Young. Look what Texas did with Young and look what it has done in the two years without him.
In support of Pryor, Young did deliver on his promise.
• It's a double negative for Michigan. Score another one for Tressel in the rivalry. You wonder where the next Wolverines quarterback is going to come from, while the Buckeyes continue to be the Big Ten favorites (and national championship contenders) for the foreseeable future.
That's bad if you're Michigan, good if you're the next SEC team to play Ohio State in a bowl.
• Speaking of Tressel, we already knew he was up there with Saban and Stoops as one of the best recruiters. But this guy has just landed the nation's No. 1 dual-threat quarterback to run what had been a pro-style offense.
It seemed to work out for Troy Smith, who went from punk to superstar in Columbus.
Amazingly, Pryor already seems to be buying into to his freshman season mirroring Tim Tebow's. In case you didn't know, Ohio State has a starting quarterback, Todd Boeckman. Pryor as a super backup might be perfect for his development.
• Does this unfortunate result for Penn State, impact Joe Paterno's future? With president Graham Spanier supposedly controlling the coach's future now, it can't help.
Pryor delayed his announcement on Feb. 6, in essence, so he could take an official visit to Penn State. It was a visit he never took.
• I feel kind of slimy for joining the breathless ranks during the recruiting process. This is a replication of a text conversation I had with Pryor in February.
Me: U R having a press conference on Wednesday?
TP: Haven't decided yet.
It's that kind of in-depth reporting that wins Pulitzers.
• Finally, I've said it before: Pryor toyed with 2A competition in Pennsylvania. I would have loved to have seen him play more against large-class schools. None of us have seen him against major-college competition.
While we're waiting for Pryor's next space walk, anyone for waffles?