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Steve and his New England roots are jumping for joy as the Patriots inch closer to the Super Bowl. Pete, however, is still licking his wounds from watching back-to-back bowl losses. Come with us if you want to live. | STEVE SEARS | PETE STELLA | | BOURBON QUESTION: The AFC and NFC Championships are set and Sears is still in love with Tom Brady. What was your favorite moment of the divisional round? | | Excuse my pal Peter. His two teams lost bowl games by an aggregate score of 101-31. Yikes. At this point, Ohio State is Bruce Willis and Ving Rhames in the back room of that pawn shop in Pulp Fiction and the SEC is the crazy pawnshop duo. Tom Brady could be the samurai sword that saves them, but alas he's too busy not getting embarrassed on national television. Happy Pete will back in no time, though. As for this weekend, the ouster of the Colts was a great moment. Peyton Manning and the Colts losing to an underdog at home in the playoffs: This is a world I'm used to. And, oh, Brady firing a near-perfect game in another Patriots playoff victory against the "Team No One Wants to Play" was nice. A splendid weekend if I must say so myself. | It's hard for me to care about the NFL since I don't have a team to cheer for and haven't followed the league outside of work for years. To the dismay of my co-workers, I most enjoyed seeing Brett Favre lead the Packers to the NFC Championship. Sorry Sears, not everyone wants to worship Tom Brady, who I hope I finally get to see take a helmet to his pretty face. Favre is the man. Sure, he's 49-years-old, says he's going to retire every week and is the obsession of thousands of media members, especially the terrible John Madden. But Favre's age and willingness to throw the ball into coverage -- even if it means an INT, which, he's thrown a lot of -- makes me admire him. I'm no Packers fan, but I'll be pulling for Brett and hoping, if this is his last game, he goes out in style. | SCOTCH QUESTION: Some poor girl got booed for wearing a Pats jersey at a Colts game.
Come on now, did the kid really deserve that? | | The little girl is from New England so she can take what the "NFL's Atlanta Braves" fans can throw at her. She knew it was coming and she took it like a champ. Of course, Boston fans would probably do the same thing if the situation was reversed, but we don't put ourselves on a pedestal of being "classy, God-fearing folk" as opposed to those secularist heathens. So what that booing showed is that the sanctimonious fans in Indianapolis are just like every other group of sports fans: obnoxious and drunk. I shudder to think what a liquored-up Pete Stella would do to a teenage girl if she walked into an Ohio State bar wearing a Mike Hart jersey. He'd probably fight her. And I think he'd win. Well, maybe he'd win. I'd give him at least a 50/50 shot. | This girl didn't deserve to be booed, but she sure has a pair on her for wearing a Pats jersey to a Colts game. What did she think would happen? Would a Michigan fan have hot wax thrown in their face for wearing a Wolverines jersey to an Ohio State game? Um, yes. Would a Yankees fan be beaten with a hose if they wore New York garb to a Red Sox game? Um, yes. I do feel bad for the girl in a way but fans, especially football ones, are jerks. You combine testosterone, alcohol and bragging rights and the term 'all men are created equal' goes right out the window. My advice: It's great to love and support your team but sometimes, just think it through. By the way Sears, your autographed bottle of Derek Jeter's cologne just came in. Want me to sign for it? | BEER QUESTION: The new Terminator show on Fox is pretty darn nifty.
Got any crazy plot ideas for those mischievous cyborgs? | | I'm surprised Pete got a chance to watch this show, what with his Sex and the City and Caroline in the City DVDs waiting for him in his apartment. The show nailed the casting of Sarah Conner, but it's time to take it further. Bring on the fighting chicken from Family Guy to fight the Connors, that thing never seems to die. In addition, Fox should hype a very special, secret guest every week to bring up everyone's hopes that Arnold Schwarzenegger will appear. But it's all a ruse. It's not Ahhnold, it's Hector Elizondo! It's Gilbert Gottfried! People will start getting angry. That's the time to throw them a bone. You build up this mysterious bad guy the entire show, but it turns out to be another no-name actor. At the end, you'd see the Governator in the back drinking coffee. Credits. Cue American Idol promos. | I'm the first to admit I am a nerd, but a sexy nerd. I love this show. However, that scene in the season premiere when the naughty Terminator poses as a substitute teacher and proceeds to take attendance was about as lame as anything I have ever seen, even worse than watching Sears try to talk to a female. If I was in charge of the show, I would take a step back from all the violence and talk about the end of the world and let those fun-loving cyborgs try and survive in every day life, such as dealing with traffic. Then, after they finish with their chores, the Terminators all head to a secret meeting place for an underground robot fight club. First one to lose its head has to buy robot booze for everyone else. I smell an Emmy. Those are still around, right? | | Previous Bar Room Banters: Jan. 10 | Dec. 27 | Dec. 21 Dec. 13 | Dec. 6 | Nov. 29 | Nov. 21 | Nov. 14 | Nov. 7 |
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