Chat Transcript
CBS SportsLine.com
May 8, 2001

Feherty, one of the most charismatic players in golf, now calls the action for CBS Sports. (CBS Sports)

Former pro and current CBS Sports analyst David Feherty chatted about this week's PGA TOUR stop, the Verizon Byron Nelson Classic at the Tournament Players Club at Las Colinas in Irving, Texas, May 10-13.

The Verizon Byron Nelson is a first-class event and has featured some of the top names, like Tiger Woods, Sergio Garcia and David Duval; and CBS will be covering the third and final rounds, this Saturday and Sunday, beginning at 4 p.m. ET Saturday and 3 p.m. ET Sunday.

Feherty, one of the most charismatic players in golf, joined CBS Sports full time in 1997, after having served as analyst for the CBS Television Network's coverage of several events in 1996, including the PGA Championship, Presidents Cup and Doral-Ryder Open.

When he was a regular on the European Tour, Feherty's victories included the ICI International, Italian Open, Scottish Open, South Africa PGA, BMW Open, Cannes Open and Madrid Open. He retired from both the European Tour and the PGA Tour in 1997.

David Feherty: Greetings Earthlings!

Question: Fill in the blanks... You should never ____ on a ____while out on the course.

David Feherty: You should never wipe your butt with a broken bottle while out on the course! When anyone asks me for a tip, that is usually what I give them.

Question: Previous generations of professional golfers have produced you and McCord behind the mike. Who are some possible future Davids and Garys that are playing right now?

David Feherty: Well Billy Ray Brown, although he is a rather large baby. Tim Herron would be one. Stuart Appleby, sharp and funny. Which would set him apart form McCord and Feherty on all counts!

Question: Waving the magic wand, we put you in charge of the TV coverage. Where is the Feherty-cam going to be?

David Feherty: Well against my better judgment, the locker room would be an interesting place. Although it would have to be a grainy black and white pin hole cameras. Like in a "7-11: Who Mugs the clerk?" camera. One to see who glued Herron's shoes together. That happens all the time. He regularly hops around the golf course.

Question: How has the game changed since Tiger came on the scene?

David Feherty: I think the game has changed with Tiger and because of Tiger. It has become more enjoyable to watch and play. If anyone thinks technology doesn't make this game more fun they need to go into the garage and pull out one of those wooden drivers and try to hit it. Tiger is the new kind of player for the new kind of equipment.

Question: We've gone through metal woods, giant club heads, and graphite/steel shafts. Where do you think the next great golfing "breakthrough" is going to come?

David Feherty: With the USGA hopefully. A sudden attack of common sense would be nice. 100 years from now people are going to look at the equipment that is non-conforming today and wonder how in the hell we ever played with it! Just like we look at hickory shafts and gutta-percha balls today.

Question: What's the weirdest golf gizmo that you've ever seen that actually worked?

David Feherty: I have a Heinz 57 pickle putter. Kind of a dill pickle on a shaft. Like most, it works when the user is in good form. I am not sure I have seen a gizmo that actually worked. You are talking to someone who thought Greg Norman's Secret was a chain of men's underwear shops.

Question: What's the most difficult thing you have to do as an on-course commentator?

David Feherty: Keep from laughing most of the time! I like to talk at a relatively normal tone of voice. I hate the whispering commentator. So I get in quickly, read the putts and get back quickly. Because the last thing the players need is my opinion.

Question: Would playing miniature golf with the family hurt someone's game? i heard those windmills are rough...

David Feherty: It is more liable to hurt your family! I think miniature golf in many ways is the purest form of the sport.

Question: Without upsetting any of the members, is there anything you would change at the Masters?

David Feherty: Anything *I* would change? Oh.. I don't think there is. They have a pretty long history of making good decisions. That is reflected in the ratings. Most people if they were only to watch one tournament the rest of their lives would choose the Masters.

Question: Where would the David Feherty Celebrity Pro-Am be played and what would be the format?

David Feherty: I would play it at home. that means I would not have to travel. It would be at Royal Oaks in Dallas. And the format would be 9 holes, scramble, in twosomes, one pro, one amateur, one dog.. actually that is a threesome. Smoke your own and find your own.

Question: Annika Sorenstam thinks that it's possible to shoot 54. Do you agree, or does she need therapy?

David Feherty: These days I will be happy to get as old as 54! Yes, I think it is possible. And I think someday someone will do it. But it will be long after someone hits me a slap in the mouth with a spade.

Question: What would be your advertisement to a person who doesn't really watch golf? What would you say to get them to watch your commentary?

David Feherty: I don't really care if they listen to my commentary, personally. There is far too much commentary. Some of the best parts of golf coverage in the past has been the silence before a dramatic moment or a great shot. These days we are bombarded with information and stats. All sorts of banal and inane information, as far as I am concerned.

Question: Will Phil Mickelson EVER win a major?

David Feherty: Yes. Yeah he will win a major and it will surprise me if he doesn't win in the next season or two. He has worked so hard and wants it more than any of the current crop.

Question: What would be the ultimate test to see who can really play the game? Have everyone use the same clubs? Same ball? How would you find out?

David Feherty: I think we already have found out! There is no club or ball that gives any one player an advantage... until they make a club or ball that makes the hole bigger.

Question: U.S. Open conditions... generally fair or unfair and why?

David Feherty: it is hard to say a course is unfair. Because it is the same for everybody. But the way a US Open golf course is setup, it makes the game very one dimensional and extremely predictable. No one misses a green by more than a yard or two. The short game is all chop and flop. And my father can hit the same shot as I can, if I miss the fairway. The British Open at Carnoustie was a prime example. It leveled the field where the less talented players could compete.

Question: Has money and greed effected golf like it has other sports?

David Feherty: No. golfers still take their own money and try to turn it into more like any business man. Golfers don't sit on the bench and earn the league minimum.

Question: Is there anything that the pros do on Tour that we really shouldn't be overly impressed with? i.e. Are they getting too much praise for the way they tie their shoes?

David Feherty: No. Most are very good at tying their shoes! Apart from Tiger, of course, who employs someone to tie his shoes.

Question: Do you watch other sports? Which, and who do you like doing commentary there?

David Feherty: I love hockey! I wish there was fighting in golf… or at least checking! Make it much more interesting. Plus hockey players are talented. Because it is very slippery out there! I almost went to the Nagano Olympics to announce the bobsled, believe it or not. I think I would like to give another sport a try. I mean, if the Jamaicans can have a bobsled team, why not an Irish announcer? Although I do have problem with big guys with huge thighs in spandex. Makes me feel a little weird. Come to think of it.. I have a problem with women with huge thighs in spandex. I think spandex just doesn't work.

Question: How DOES your wife survive the well aimed barbs that come forth from you??

David Feherty: My wife TERRIFIES me! She is much smaller but a lot smarter. And she doesn't have big thighs or wear spandex.

Question: Who do we pick in a $5 Nassau, you or McCord?

David Feherty: It would be easier to pick a broken nose! For technical merit you would have to pick me. But for artistic impression there is no question McCord is the more stylish. He is also completely clench free on the follow through, as you can tell from the cut of his pants. I tend to hang on a wee bit these days.

Question: If you could try one thing in sports with no fear of getting killed or maimed, what would it be?

David Feherty: I think I would like to be a deer with a 30-06. Although I don't really consider humping to be a sport. Humping is an occupation. In a sport both sides need to know they are playing.

David Feherty: Thanks for all the shouting and yelling from behind the ropes. My demographic is a big fat guy with a mustard stain and a Miller Lite. I love you!